I feel light and fantastic each morning, I feel happy, revitalized and fresh. My 5 days with the beautiful people in this photo has changed me as a person. Those 5 days changed my perspective of me and who I am, of how I fit into this world that we “Live” in and “Live” is an important word. I let myself become immersed in this week. It was pure bliss and excitement and its difficult to explain without sounding as though I’ve gone off and joined a cult or something. I’ve had my church days of leading worship, of dancing, of listening to my soul as we prayed with people and healed them, but this is something new. It deeper, its intense and freedom at the same time. “Live” is an important world when you have had “Cancer” If you have followed my blog you will know my story, but this week has taught me to live again. I guess “Cancer” stole from me the enjoyment in life. It stole my ability to feel and experience. I felt like I was broken, and didn’t know how to join in. I felt separated from everyone as though I had a big flag on my head. I was withdrawn and held myself back. On the outside I guess everything looked normal, I laughed, I danced, I rode my bike, did all of the normal every day things that people do, but on the inside I felt empty. When I look back it felt as though I was in a slow motion black and white movie. Feeling but not immersing. Loving but not. Happy but not. This week has shown me that this is MY LIFE , it was a kick in the butt to get back on board and start living again. I see the joy in most everything I do as though its for the first time. I have a huge huge appreciation of my family and those that are close to me. I can see the beauty in nature, I can “feel” the people around me now, and I am totally blown away. As I read back on blogs I’ve written this year, it seems like all this was here waiting for me, as though I was preparing myself for this journey, and that is amazing.
These beautiful people in this photo were strangers to me as I packed my bag and headed off to the east coast for a 5 day conference. Young, energetic, loving, and very accepting of me. Not once during the weeks leading up to this seminar, did I give any thought to what I was going to learn. I just assumed it was more nutrition. A wellness programm. I wonder if I had known what I was going to learn, if my ego would’ve taken over instead. I wonder if the journey would have been so fulfilling, or my head would’ve gotten in the way. I felt real joy and acceptance, I felt immense happiness and lightness. I began to realise that I am important and I’m not broken and I am a whole complete person. ………….a huge turning point and a great new way to begin the next chapter ………..